Exams are over now and it is time for a vacation and some rest. I have a lot of free time and I should prepare myself for some licensing examinations or at least the MCI screening test which I plan on taking next September. Some how I find it pretty hard to concentrate. I’ve been doing things with no interest or concentration. A lot of thoughts fill my mind. Memories of her fill my thoughts.
I keep on thinking “What is she doing now?”, “Is she smiling?”,”Is she happy?”. I sit alone and think about her smile and I count the hours that passed by, since I last saw her angel face. It is a miracle that I held myself together for so long without making her laugh at my silly jokes. Life feels empty with out the feeling of her presence in my proximity. To live the rest of my holidays alone with her not being here seems almost absurd.
She did promise to call me from home, but I’m almost certain that she already forgot everything about me and her promises in the overwhelming joy of being home. She made it quite clear that she is quite committed to her boyfriend, but I still cannot make up my mind to think of anything else. I’ve been told by many to move on, but obviously I cannot move on.
I hope I’ll be able to pull myself together and make my vacation useful somehow. I’m not a big fan of vacations as they make life boring. Summer vacations are the worst since I do no like to get my butt out in the summer heat. With deserted hostel and I not wanting to go out in the day time, I expect to have a pretty lonely and boring summer vacation.
Quite some time ago, I joined a few inline skater groups online. That was when I got my first in- line skates. Already being part of many online groups, I must say that I noticed very less activities in those groups. I met a cute girl names ‘Nadya‘ in one of those groups. I got a little carried away and losing my usual ‘I don’t talk to strangers, because my mama told me not to’ state, started talking to her. It was usually, I asking dumb questions about skates and such.
In a few days, I almost felt like I’ve found a new friend in her. She is a student in a I-don’t-fucking-remember-the-name-of-it college. She is an aspiring hairstylist on her 3rd year. After my earlier haircut from a good hairstylist, I was a little hyped up on getting a good hair-cut. She told me that she needed some heads to train for her practical. Coincidentally, her practice was starting from 30th may. That is the time when I’d need a haircut, so I volunteered to offer my precious head.
Honestly, I had my razor ready, just for the worst case scenario. Like they say “hope for the best and prepare for the worst”. What is the worst that can happen right? I’ll just forget the episode of the trauma of the ear-lobe I got when I was 5. Luckily for me, the cut was too small and by now, even the scar is not visible. I’m a student myself and my field demands that I train on people. If I wasn’t ready to let some one else study on me, it would probably make me the same selfish prick as every other dude in my university. Continue reading 4 hours
Like every other day, I woke up in the morning. A couple of days ago, that is what I thought would happen. Unfortunately, 2 crazy girls Frida and her friend N.
Did curiosity bite you in the butt and made you wonder who is this N person? Don’t worry, you are not the only one. I’m sure I’d be curious too, if I did not already know who it is. Lets just say it is an absolutely mind-blowing girl who asked me not to publish her name on the blog (By now, I’m sure you have this inner urge to stalk her. That applies only to caligynephiles). Using that word just made me feel good.
Since they convinced me to do an all night psychiatry revision, I did not sleep last night, If only I’d have realised that psychiatry can be really boring and disgusting when you read at 3 ~ 6 AM, I’d have went to sleep like every other day. By the time I realised what I’ve got myself into, I was well past the time where I could have had some sleep.
Had this feeling in the past,
quite a few years ago;
Shattering my little heart,
the one I loved had to go.
Lasted for seven sweet years,
we lived like two happy birds;
left me in a sea of tears,
hearing those hurtful words.
Continue reading In vain!